A local newspaper copy editor recently averred that he has run into a grammatical phenomenon that is seemingly unique to southwestern Michigan: the regular occurrence of folks swapping the words "bring" and "take."  Indeed I am one of the guilty masses, "bringing" when I should be "taking" and "taking" what I should be "bringing."

At various junctures in my life, well-meaning teachers, family, and friends have sought to correct this oral faux pas in me, but without any lasting success.  I am now used to quizzical glances and slight snickers when I "bring" instead of "take."  However, most locals, it seems, are tolerant of this usage — or more likely are unaware that I said anything amiss.

My wife is similarly challenged with a different set of words: leave and let.  Apparently that was a societal characteristic of the area in which she was reared.  She often "leaves" when she should "let."  This used to bug me and I would endeavor to set her straight.  However, each attempt to correct would result in her logical retort as to why "leave" was just as appropriate as "let."  Now I am also confused about "leaving" and "letting."

A related area is the operative word for carbonated beverages.  In my vernacular, I defer to "pop."  For less casual settings, I opt to say "soft drinks."  In other parts of the country terms such as "soda" or even "coke" are the readily accepted nomenclature for all things carbonated. 

Once, when traveling in a state far south from where I live, I attempted to respect local convention and use the term I understood to be appropriate to the locale.  The waitress looked at me and laughed.  "Honey, you're not from around here, are you?"  To which I thought, "And where I'm from, no one calls me honey."

It seemed that every eye in the diner was upon me, having apparently exposed myself as a Yankee.  Eventually, the crimson drained from my face and I returned to my normal shade of pale.  "I'll take a root beer," I said.  Hoping to end the unfortunate affair.

Now when I travel, I try to avoid using any reference to carbonation if at all possible.

So, please don't think any less of me if I offer to bring you a soda; just leave it be.